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THE TONY ABBOTT THAT I KNOW

September 24, 2012

Deputy Opposition Leader; Julie “the cockroach” Bishop

The Coalition are in crisis following last week’s polls that show the Gillard Government gaining and equal footing with the Opposition on a two-party preferred basis; the crucial election-deciding category.

Despite relentless attacks from the Opposition including the hyper-hysteria of the carbon tax, support for the Gillard Government is continually trending upwards while the Opposition’s fortunes are receding.

The trajectory of doom is likely to continue in the near term, following the crash and burn of the Liberal Party’s Cory Bernardi, who somewhat clumsily attempted to link gay marriage with being a precursor to bestiality – sex between humans and animals.

Opposition Leader Tony Abbott subsequently dumped the Parliamentary Secretary, however he refused to be drawn on whether he agreed with Mr Bernardi’s remarks, instead citing “ill-discipline” as the reason behind his sacking.

With his “satisfaction” rating now sitting at a record low of minus 60 per cent, the Liberal Party dispatched Julia Bishop and Christopher Pyne late last week to front the media with a carefully scripted oratory called “The Tony Abbott I know.”

It went something like this…

JULIE BISHOP AND CHRISTOPHER PYNE (to press): The Tony Abbott that I know …

CHRISTOPHER PYNE (to press): Went out with his local “firies” brigade. .

JULIE BISHOP (to press): Spent Saturday with his local fire brigade.

CHRISTOPHER PYNE (to press): And spent Sunday leading a blind person.

JULIE BISHOP (to press): He ran a marathon as a guide for a blind person.

JULIE BISHOP AND CHRISTOPHER PYNE (to press): That’s the Tony Abbott that I know.

Which is just lovely.  The question is though, does any anyone really believe them?

If the polls are anything to go by (which they usually are), apparently not.

That might be “The Tony Abbott they Know.”

Everyone else thinks he’s a cunt.

 

 

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33 Comments leave one →
  1. el gordo permalink
    September 24, 2012 3:22 pm

    Can we have an election now?

  2. TB Queensland permalink
    September 24, 2012 3:24 pm

    Mate, I’m sorry about this but I really am sick of hearing politicians and journalists pronouncing “bestiality” incorrectly, (there is NO “A” in bestiality) … BEASTiality is incorrect … and it is pronounced BESTiality … as in proNUNciation not proNOUNCiation (another of my pet hates) …

    http://oxforddictionaries.com/definition/english/bestiality?q=BESTiality

    Corrective rant over …

    +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

    Which is just lovely. The question is though, does any anyone really believe them?

    WGAF! Do they involve skills and knowledge required by the Prime Minister of Australia? No, a whole range of kids and adults do the same thing every day of the week … do they sprout about it on TV (or get others to … ) WALOBS!

  3. September 24, 2012 3:28 pm

    “there is NO “A” in bestiality”

    Duly noted and amended. Although it’s a bit bloody rich for you to stroll in here with your grammar hat on given your propensity to stuff up your apostrophes…!!!

    Just sayin’ 😉

  4. TB Queensland permalink
    September 24, 2012 3:38 pm

    LOL!

  5. Tom of Melbourne permalink
    September 24, 2012 4:31 pm

    Nice photo of Julie Bishop.

    Though Julia Gillard would be wise to compare necklines, Gillard needs to put her’s about 3′ closer to her chin. The scoop look might have been ok for her about 20 years ago.

  6. TB Queensland permalink
    September 24, 2012 4:40 pm

    Nice photo of Julie Bishop.

    I agree, ToM, I think it has a lot of depth and brings out her true character … I’m not sure whether the real emphasis is the set of the mouth or the eyes … still … NVC’s should always be “read” in clusters … so it’s really the overall effect … you could almost imagine the sound from her mouth too …”die” or “arrggh” or “arse’ (as in my “arse”) … brilliant photo …

    Not sure what the “neckline” bit is about but your posts have been a bit, shall we say, disjointed, since he (Tony Abbott that is) took a tumble in the polls and folk started to figure out the BS … hang in there … must be hard …

    Personally, I don’t give a fuck who gets in next, as long as they can govern the country … that probably puts him (Tony Abbott) out of the running …

  7. September 24, 2012 10:15 pm

    How dare you refer to Julie Bishop as a ‘cockroach’. You’ve just seriously denigrated one of my best friends and an insect that’s been around for several million years and is highly resistant to radiation! A ‘head louse’ would be more appropriate, I’ve never liked them!
    Yours, Louie the Fly. 😉

  8. September 25, 2012 8:00 am

    Dear Louie,

    The “cockroach” remark is meant to be a compliment, a testament to Julie’s survival. As Deputy Opposition Leader she’s outlived several Opposition Leaders. She’s quite a talent!

  9. September 25, 2012 3:27 pm

    The Tony Abbott that I know wants to dramatically increase spending on the armed forces. Straight out of the Republican/Tea Party handbook.

    Is he capable of any orginial thought at all…..??

  10. TB Queensland permalink
    September 25, 2012 3:59 pm

    The Tony Abbott that I know wants to dramatically increase spending on the armed forces.

    What is it about the Right and planning violent conflicts …*

    Is he capable of any orginial thought at all…..??

    You have to ask? Can I ask the audience?

    *sarc alert …

  11. September 25, 2012 10:17 pm

    (stick your dictionary up your arse)

    “ dramatically increase spending on the armed forces. Straight out of the Republican/Tea Party handbook. “

    With the Tea-Hatter crowd so keen on guns and war, they don`t seem capable of connecting the dots to medical funding. Wouldn`t anybody keen on gun ownership want a system to make sure that bullets can be removed in case of “accidents“??

  12. el gordo permalink
    September 28, 2012 11:42 am

    “It was a long time ago, we were at uni. There was a fire in the house next door and we all went round and, by that stage, a few of us got out of the pub and we managed to get the kids out of the house. It was just one of those things. You’ve had a few drinks, something happened and you did what needed to be done to try and make things as good as you could.”

    ‘He had almost “entirely forgotten” about the incident, but an old friend had told the story to Fairfax journalist Deborah Snow in 2000 for a profile piece. “In the end, people will judge me, for better or worse, on my political performance,” he said.’

    The Oz fights back in this war of words.

  13. TB Queensland permalink
    September 28, 2012 2:53 pm

    It was just one of those things. You’ve had a few drinks, something happened and you did what needed to be done to try and make things as good as you could.”

    Exactly … so Tones isn’t really speshul at all … ’bout time he recognised that … a few others might then …

  14. el gordo permalink
    September 28, 2012 4:15 pm

    ‘Tones isn’t really speshul’

    No, the monk recognises that ‘shit happens’ and he’s modest about he part he played in a minor drama.

  15. el gordo permalink
    September 28, 2012 4:16 pm

    the part he played

  16. TB Queensland permalink
    September 28, 2012 4:41 pm

    (“he’s modest about he part he played in a minor drama.”)

    And exactly what was that? Can in hand laughing at the flames?

  17. Tom of Melbourne permalink
    September 28, 2012 5:05 pm

    After all the bluster from Roxon and barrackers, they’ve paid him $50,000.

    Claims of (sexual and other) harassment are rarely clear cut, much of it happens in private between 2 people only. It’s always “He said…”, “no I didn’t, that’s a lie”, “no it isn’t here are some texts”, that’s not true, you’ve taken them out of context”, “no I didn’t…” and repeat this about 15 times.

    There’s lots of “s/he asked for it” and “they knew what they were doing”…followed by “they misunderstood, it was all a joke”

    The most vile form is the misuse of authority towards a subordinate.

    The way people have moved to unilaterally condemn a complainant, in a subordinate position to a powerful politician is shameful.

    As I’ve said, the government has chosen to cough up, such was its judgement about its case and regardless of the protestations of Roxon, coughing up cash says something about their case.

  18. September 28, 2012 5:17 pm

    “coughing up cash says something about their case.”

    Agreed. It sounds a lot like “go away money”.

  19. JAWS permalink
    September 28, 2012 5:40 pm

    The Federal Police and the Office of the Commonwealth Director of Public Prosecutions wont be so accommodating.

  20. September 28, 2012 5:40 pm

    Agreed. It sounds a lot like “go away money”.
    +
    There really is no end to the Canberra Lunacy, from the duopoly.

  21. Tom of Melbourne permalink
    September 28, 2012 6:36 pm

    Interesting… this is a phot of the person charged with the rape & murder of Jill Meagher-

    http://www.theage.com.au/victoria/youre-being-followed-backpacker-sexually-assaulted-after-con-20120801-23dvb.html#ixzz27iyv46ia

    This article contains a photofit of someone wanted for a rape back in August-

    http://aussiecriminals.com.au/2012/09/25/what-happened-to-jill-meagher/adrian-ernest-bayley/

  22. Tom of Melbourne permalink
    September 28, 2012 6:37 pm

    Photos are the wrong way around!

    Some sleuth

  23. September 28, 2012 6:45 pm

    It does look like the same bloke Tom.

  24. el gordo permalink
    September 28, 2012 8:04 pm

    A striking resemblance.

  25. September 28, 2012 8:38 pm

    Sorry Tom-Melb, have to disagree. The general first look, white guy, small ears, short hair match. When I viewed both images, I couldn`t see `specific` matches. If it turns out he is the St-Kilda guy, the cops should ditch the rendered images and go back to the old segment style, photo-fit mugshots. They should also have side views. Witnesses are not necessarily viewing the `wanted` front on.

    (but I enjoyed this Little project, thanks)

  26. October 5, 2012 1:35 pm

    “That Abbott has been forced to resort today to using his wife in a kind of ‘some of my best friends are women’ campaign is testimony to what sort of toxic feedback the Liberals must be getting about Abbott’s political style from female voters.”

    http://www.crikey.com.au/2012/10/05/tables-turn-on-stumblebum-abbott-as-labor-cuts-its-error-rate/

  27. Tom of Melbourne permalink
    October 5, 2012 3:44 pm

    My observation about Gillard…

    She isn’t respected, and it has nothing to do with her gender. The lack of respect is because she is a dishonest bogan.

    People around my part of town aren’t traditional ALP voters, quite the contrary. But they had respect for Rudd, and years ago my more affluent friends had respect for Keating and Hawke. There wasn’t the ridicule that Gillard gets.

    She speaks like a bogan, she presents as one. She has a record of dishonesty in politics.

    People that may have considered a vote for the ALP under previous leaders don’t even begin to contemplate it under Gillard.

    …and it has nothing to do with her gender or the media.

  28. October 5, 2012 4:02 pm

    “My observation about Gillard…”

    And to think, we had no idea….

  29. Ol' Sancty permalink
    October 5, 2012 4:04 pm

    I think Keane may well have jumped the gun there. The handbag hit squad is going to backfire terribly, as will the overreach on the Alan Jones stuff.

    AWU hasn’t gone away with Bob Kernohan going on camera today. And the budget figures are looking horrendous.

  30. el gordo permalink
    October 5, 2012 4:19 pm

    With Slipper before the courts, I don’t blame Abbott for concentrating on other ‘talking points’.

  31. TB Queensland permalink
    October 5, 2012 4:58 pm

    And to think, we had no idea….

    GOLD! GOLD! GOLD!

    For the voyeurs …

    http://www.news.com.au/national/judge-questions-slipper-court-attack/story-fndo4bst-1226489041947

    Would you buy a used car off, Ashby? Or Slipper … 🙄

  32. October 5, 2012 5:10 pm

    I can hear the theme song to the TV drama already…

    “you don’t bring me strawberries anymore”

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