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PM GILLARD IN SECOND SANDWICH ASSAULT!

May 30, 2013
Capture

Exclusive footage shows sandwich captured mid-flight!

****A GUTTER TRASH EXCLUSIVE****

In what is fast becoming a scholastic Mexican wave, Prime Minister Julia Gillard has once again fallen victim to another random sandwich attack during a visit to Lyneham High School in Canberra this morning.

According to our exclusive sources, the sandwich was made of white bread and contained salami.

The sandwich was not toasted and it also had not been sliced.

It was launched from behind the Prime Minister, continued over Ms Gillard”s head, and landed at her feet at precisely 11.46am.

Earlier this month Queensland teen Kyle Thomson was suspended from Marsden State High School after a similar incident during a visit by the Prime Minister.

NOT GUILTY

The 16-year-old later professed his innocence.

He said he had tried to knock the sandwich out of another student’s hand.

Asked if she was disappointed to about today’s sandwich incident, Ms Gillard joked the thrower “must have thought I was hungry”.

Today’s sandwich hurler has not yet been identified.

It is unclear what steps are being taken to discipline the culprit, with principal Colleen Matheson declining to comment. Support staff and teachers at the school were disappointed and on edge.

We understand that Police and Counsellors are on their way to provide psychological support.

 

 

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51 Comments leave one →
  1. May 30, 2013 2:05 pm

    Sandwich reportedly containing salami, reports of freshness still unconfirmed…

  2. May 30, 2013 2:37 pm

    I have a deep suspicion that the perpetrator was a NO Coalition terrorist with the smell of garlic on their breath! ;-)) The white bread was a cunning subterfuge to lead ASIO astray!

  3. Ol' Sancty permalink
    May 30, 2013 2:43 pm

    How easily the most innocent things can get outta hand…….

  4. IPA address permalink
    May 30, 2013 2:47 pm

    Hopefully the wont try and margarinise the kid. Butter his friends show saladarity at a time like this.

  5. May 30, 2013 2:50 pm

    groan….

  6. TB Queensland permalink
    May 30, 2013 2:51 pm

    ToSY …… 🙄

    How could it not be sliced if it was a sandwich … duh …

    Where was the phutballer to point out the culprit!

  7. TB Queensland permalink
    May 30, 2013 2:53 pm

    I suppose this is just another example of how most people want to be Queenslanders … its just not as simple as emulation …originality has always been a major key …

  8. Ol' Sancty permalink
    May 30, 2013 3:03 pm

    Hehe, IPA hamming it up…….

    Pretty cheesy really.

  9. TB Queensland permalink
    May 30, 2013 3:09 pm

    Strange all the crap about a word and a footballer … and this missile at the Australian Prime Minister (whoever it is) is just ignored …

    Unfknbelievable …

  10. IPA address permalink
    May 30, 2013 3:21 pm

    Very funny, Snackty. Whichever way you cut it, this kid’s in a real pickle.

  11. Splatterbottom permalink
    May 30, 2013 3:31 pm

    It’s just ill-bread children hamming it up. The face of sangerism in Australia today is smiling blonde 10 year old.

  12. IPA address permalink
    May 30, 2013 3:34 pm

    Notice Gillard’s rye smile?

  13. Walrus (Prince of Darkness and Evil) permalink
    May 30, 2013 4:11 pm

    So we have footage of it as well.

    Abe Zapruder’s legacy lives on……………………

    I would have thought this attempted assassination by sandwich would only happen along Sydney’s Lower North Shore or in South Yarra, Toorak etc.

    I cant believe it’s occurred in CANBERRA

  14. TB Queensland permalink
    May 30, 2013 4:20 pm

    This is just pouring salt on an open woundsandwich …

  15. May 30, 2013 4:22 pm

    It would be reasonable to conclude that had she been in Lakemba it would’ve been a kekab, which given its cylindrical shape and heavier weight, may have had a better chance at hitting its target.

    An uncut sandwich isn’t really going to cut it.

  16. TB Queensland permalink
    May 30, 2013 4:29 pm

    what’s a kekbab …?

    Just askin’ 😉

  17. May 30, 2013 4:36 pm

    smart arse.

  18. May 30, 2013 5:49 pm

    Wouldn’t it be more sensible for Julia to do her school visits after 2.00pm when they are more likely to be sandwich free zones…?

  19. May 30, 2013 5:50 pm

    the damn pollies have no business persecuting children at school, they don`t vote, Let`s hope there are more sandwiches launched from the grassy-knolls

  20. TB Queensland permalink
    May 30, 2013 6:09 pm

    I’d like to see a few sausage rolls aimed at Abbott and Gillard … especially when they’re trying to keep a hard ‘at on …

    ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

    smart arse.

    That might be acceptable language in your circles but as an heterosexual man I find that quite insulting …

    I will simply not be able to enjoy, The Minister’s, wonderful panko crumbed fish platter and onion rings now …

    When will people learn … 🙄

  21. May 30, 2013 6:36 pm

    “trying to keep a hard ‘at on …”

    I had to read that twice. I thought you said… nah never mind..

  22. IPAddress permalink
    May 30, 2013 9:22 pm

    I’d like to compare PM Gillard to a fishwife, only I have far too much respect for fishwives.

  23. IPA address permalink
    May 31, 2013 8:25 am

    The attacker was a salamic fundamentalist, apparently. He was heard to shout “celeriac bar”.

  24. Preposterously Evil Walrus permalink
    May 31, 2013 10:01 am

    Groooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooan

    🙂

  25. Preposterously Evil Walrus permalink
    May 31, 2013 10:04 am

    I’m still constantly amazed at the fact that Gillard is sooooooooooooooooooooooooo utterly pathetic………………………….so utterly incompetent…………………………………………..so utterly out of touch………………………..so utterly contemtible……………………………..

    That she single handedly has made Abbott electable.

    It really shocks me

  26. May 31, 2013 11:45 am

    “she single handedly has made Abbott electable”

    I know. It’s quite an accomplishment.

  27. TB Queensland permalink
    May 31, 2013 12:23 pm

    I know. It’s quite an accomplishment.

    Its not much of a gene pool to select from …

  28. TB Queensland permalink
    May 31, 2013 12:26 pm

    What about Brandis … what a brilliant performance last night on lateline … typical fkn lawyer … thick a s brick …

    But oh how we giggled at every utterance … and with a straight face too … he’s like Abetz, if they smiled their ears would fall off in surprise … 🙄

  29. Tom of Melbourne permalink
    June 2, 2013 3:36 pm

    Still months from September’s election and epitaphs are already being written for Julia Gillard’s prime ministership. Characteristic of these hyperbolic times, they lean towards the extreme. The ”worst prime minister in Australia’s history leading the worst-ever government”, asserted one veteran columnist, not concerning himself with any serious comparison between Gillard and the 26 previous occupants of the office.

    Read more: http://www.theage.com.au/opinion/political-news/the-loved-and-loathed-20130601-2niau.html#ixzz2V2BTVvgR

    I think Gillard will rank about equal last, with McMahon.

  30. Neil of Sydney permalink
    June 2, 2013 4:02 pm

    These are her so-called achievements

    “and on this criterion measures such as the first serious response to climate change, a national disability insurance scheme, national broadband infrastructure and a new education funding system have the makings of a substantial legacy”

    O.K. I might give Gillard the first point about climate change but what did the Howard govt do?? I suspect Howard thought climate change was a load of crap but that does not mean howard/Costello did not do anything about renewable energy. They had lots of programs to encourage renewable energy in spite of Howards belief that AGW is a load of crap.

    NDIS?? It appears that all the ALP has to do is announce some scheme and their supporters start behaving like fans at a rock concert. No problem with giving praise but lets give praise when the scheme is up and working.

    NBN?? Where is it?? After 6 years do we have better broadband??

    The 2007 Coalition broadband policy was better for Australia

  31. egg permalink
    June 2, 2013 4:17 pm

    Climate change remains a bipartisan fraud.

  32. TB Queensland permalink
    June 2, 2013 4:49 pm

    NBN?? Where is it?? After 6 years do we have better broadband??

    The 2007 Coalition broadband policy was better for Australia

    What was that policy? Why is it better? How is it better ? Better who for?

  33. TB Queensland permalink
    June 2, 2013 4:56 pm

    Yep, the NBN is really sitting on its arse … where do you live?

    http://www.nbnco.com.au/when-do-i-get-it/rollout-map.html

  34. TB Queensland permalink
    June 2, 2013 5:01 pm

    NBN will have a similar (if not greater impact) than the first telegraph system)

    Social impact [edit]

    The social impact of the arrival of the telegraph was great. There was fervour for telegraphic information transfer. By far the largest customers were the Government, business and the press. Before the telegraph news and mail could take three months to reach England, the telegraph reduced this to around seven hours.[6] As the telegraph spread provincial and city newspapers published sections by-lined ‘by Electric Telegraph’. Until the 1870s overseas news was telegraphed from Adelaide being the first port of call with telegraphic connection to the eastern states. This gave Adelaide a strategic and financial boost. Charles Todd commented that ‘ ‘

    we had only one intercolonial wire and on the arrival of every English mail, there was an exciting amount of rivalry between the different newspapers in Sydney and Melbourne, great efforts being made to secure first possession of the line

    “For the business community the telegraph signalled prosperity and wealth. City and country telegraph offices became the centre of trade where orders were placed, banking transacted, market information exchanged. One important duty of the telegraph system was to keep the time of the nation. Time signals were transmitted to all telegraph stations in each colony at one o’clock each day and weather observations were likewise transmitted back to the state capitals. Science also benefited, one particular case was the use of the telegraph to determine longitude when in 1868 Todd with the help of the Government astronomers in NSW and Victoria linked up the Observatories with a temporary direct telegraph link. The transit of 15 select stars were observed and recorded on the Melbourne Chronograph via the telegraph from Sydney. With further observations and recordings made near Wentworth Todd was able to establish the position of the 141st degree of east longitude to give a boundary line of the border between South Australia and Victoria. Towards the close of the century Australia had become one of the largest users of the telegraph.

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/History_of_telegraphy_in_Australia

  35. TB Queensland permalink
    June 2, 2013 5:05 pm

    That’s the Libs policy, Kneel … now tell me …

    Why is it better? How is it better ? Better who for?

  36. TB Queensland permalink
    June 2, 2013 5:46 pm

    C’mon, Kneel, can’t your Young Liberal supervisor give you an answer? or are you busy trying to find a “cut & paste” answer … YOU tell me in YOUR own words …

    better be quick … my speed ahs just been cut … I’ve run out of bandwidth! LOL!

  37. June 2, 2013 5:56 pm

    leave Kneel alone TB.
    Kneel is an up-coming Young Liberal operator who will go far provided he remains giving “cut & paste” answers from the bolt blog or similar hand-book, and doesn`t go and get himself involved in outrageous activities like thinking and answering for himself.

  38. Tom of Melbourne permalink
    June 2, 2013 6:10 pm

    It is reasonable to examine the ALP’s NBN-
    *Over budget
    *Behind schedule
    *Documented OHS problems

    When projects run behind schedule and cause political difficulty, is the political ‘hurry up’ a cause of the overlooking of safety systems, and therefore the root cause of the OHS problems?

  39. Neil of Sydney permalink
    June 2, 2013 6:22 pm

    This was the Coalitions broadband plan for regional Australia. The contracts were signed but after the election Conroy broke the contract.

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/OPEL_Networks

    And this was the Coalitions plan for Australia

    http://www.minister.dcita.gov.au/coonan/media/media_releases/australia_connected_fast_affordable_broadband_for_all_australians

    Based on the current rate of progress we will all be dead before Labors NBN is finished.

  40. TB Queensland permalink
    June 2, 2013 6:59 pm

    When projects run behind schedule and cause political difficulty, is the political ‘hurry up’ a cause of the overlooking of safety systems, and therefore the root cause of the OHS problems?

    That is just plain hogwash and a denial of reality, ToM … if you’re just BS for political purposes I can sort understand the BS (even though people’s lives are at stake)… but if you really believe that, then you have little or no knowledge of business or how its run, who’s responsible and IR history and developments in OHS … your earlier “professional claims” are at risk with such nonsense …

    The root cause, as you put it, is a problem from the sixties to the eighties when asbestos was used as the panacea for all concrete products … you probably drink water delivered via asbestos pipes … as are mine – the difference between you and me? I know the “dangers” – I very much doubt you do?

    +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

    Based on the current rate of progress we will all be dead before Labors NBN is finished.**

    Prove it …

    Was that what the Young Liberal Branch Manager said?

    Dog give me strength!

  41. Neil of Sydney permalink
    June 2, 2013 7:05 pm

    What has happened re: NBN in the last 6 years??

    I base my beliefs on previous ALP policies. They usually end in disaster.

    We had 6 asylum seekers in detention in 2007. We now have 6,000.

    Strangely the people who were outraged about Howard locking people up are now silent.

  42. June 2, 2013 7:43 pm

    Well trained Tory-kids like yomm never provide `full-and-true` details to to dot-pointed so-called complaints like *ohs/safety-problems and *behind-schedule which are Telstra`s asbestos ducts and 9-month delay (Tory`s-wanted-Telstra) but also enjoy blatant lies *cost, which is fixed in contract. Kneel is learning rapidly from his `mentor` yomm by referencing `opel`, the Howard regime`s death throe, non-fiber sub-standard network idea. Kneel is coming along nicely in the world of derp, and should be a source of pride for yomm and the rest of delusional society.

  43. Neil of Sydney permalink
    June 2, 2013 8:08 pm

    7.30

    Labor has had 6 years to introduce high speed broadband.

    I have yet to see it.

    Actually not that i would want it. i want affordable broadband.

    Labor lied in 2007 because they knew that almost 50% of the population are fools.

    We will be dead before Conroys NBN is installed.

  44. Tom of Melbourne permalink
    June 2, 2013 9:41 pm

    It is entirely reasonable to question the cause of all the NBN OHS issues, which aren’t simply related to non compliance with asbestos removal.

    There is now mounting evidence of a range of other deficiencies.

    Arguably there now is more pressure, more hurry.

    TB, what happens to safety under such conditions?

  45. Splatterbottom permalink
    June 3, 2013 11:30 am

    “Labor has had 6 years to introduce high speed broadband.”

    Initially it was to be at a cost to government of $4.7bn.

    Then Underpants Conroy finally got to chat to Krudd by jumping on a plane with him and a thought-bubble later the cost had blown out by an order of magnitude.

    That facile approach to policy making is typical of this ridiculous government.

    The sad thing is that the Libs seem to have the same precipitate penchant for policy-making. Abbott’s PPL scheme came as a surprise to most of his party.

  46. TB Queensland permalink
    June 3, 2013 12:11 pm

    Arguably there now is more pressure, more hurry.

    You answer your own questions …

  47. Tom of Melbourne permalink
    June 3, 2013 12:45 pm

    Following the withdrawal of the talented Ged Kearney from Batman, another woman has nominated.

    Mary-Anne Thomas is executive manager of Plan International, a childrens development agency. Why would the ALP want a woman like her, when they can have a faceless man?

  48. egg permalink
    June 3, 2013 2:16 pm

    🙂

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