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Scott Morrison explains: “Why God abandoned me.”

May 22, 2022

FORMER PRIME MINISTER Scott Morrison is reportedly devastated following his crushing defeat at the federal election.

A senior Liberal insider told The Gutter Trash that the Liberal Party leader was confident of a repeat performance of his so-called election-winning “miracle” in 2019 telling the party faithful God spoke to him through a talking hedgehog earlier this week that he was “destined to remain PM forever.”

According to reports, the hedgehog said: “Have I not brought you this far? Now is not the the time to doubt your magnificence”.

In response, Morrison reminded the hedgehog that he too, had played his part of the deal – trying to get Brain Houston to the Whitehouse and by promoting incompetent but god-fearing pentecostal politicians to senior positions within his own cabinet.

Nevertheless, there was no repeat miracle and the Liberal Party has been annihilated with a generation of senior Liberal figures including Josh Frydenberg, Trent Zimmerman, Dave Sharma and Tim Wilson ousted from their seats and their political careers in tatters.

The avuncular Peter Dutton, who appears to have held on in the seat of Dickson is expected to become the Leader of whatever’s left of the Liberal Party, which seems strangely fitting.

The lord moves in mysterious ways.

John Howard confronts voters: “Who DJ’s like a Mad Cunt..?”

May 18, 2022

In what can only be only be described as a sign of “complete description” former Prime Minister John Howard, yes he who not only only lost an election in a landslide defeat but also lost his own seat, has been seen threatening voters to not just only vote Liberal or suffer the consequences but hell mend anyone who challenges his mastery of the funky town turntables.

Election Night Bingo!

May 6, 2022


Just when you thought it was safe to return to the Bingo halls of Brighton or the Rooty Hill RSL, The Gutter Trash presents our infamous Election Night Bingo Drinking Game.

Here’s how it works…

Simply print out the Election Night bingo card above and then mark off the catch phrases as they are uttered by the irrepressible Antony Green at the ABC tally room, or one of suckhole guests on the panel.

A “responsible drinking guide” is suggested at the top of the table for those who want to make an occasion out of it.


ALP surges ahead of LNP as interest rates dominate campaign

May 3, 2022

The ALP has increased its lead over the over the Morrison LNP Government as higher than expected ABS inflation increases upward pressure on interest rates.

The ALP gained 1% point on a two-party preferred basis during the week to Sunday May 1, increasing its lead to 11% points according to the latest Roy Morgan Poll conducted from April 25 to May 1, 2022.

The weekly Roy Morgan Government Confidence Rating plunged 8pts to 84 this week after the ABS reported higher than expected inflation of 5.1% for the year to March 2022 – the highest figure for over 20 years. The higher than expected inflation has increased the pressure on the RBA to raise interest rates for the first time in more than a decade – perhaps as soon as today.

There are now far more Australians, 50% (up 3.5% points), who say the country is ‘heading in the wrong direction’ compared to just over a third of Australians, 34% (down 4.5% points), who say the country is ‘heading in the right direction’.

This week’s result is the first swing to the ALP so far during the campaign and if a Federal Election had been held last weekend the ALP would have won a clear majority.

The law is clear: Guide Dogs Australia must lose its charitable status.

April 20, 2022

GUIDE DOGS VICTORIA IS IN FULL DAMAGE CONTROL MODE after its CEO Karen Hayes appeared in flyers emblazoned with Liberal Party colours backing Josh Frydenberg in his push to be re-elected as the Member for Kooyong.

Under the heading “Why I’m supporting Josh Frydenberg,” Hayes, pictured clutching a puppy is quoted as saying “Time and time again, Josh has shown his genuine care for Guide Dogs Victoria and the people with low vision and blindness we serve.”

However, the move appears to directly contravene Federal Government guidelines that stipulate that a charity must not “promote (or oppose) a political party or candidate for political office.”

The law is clear. Such conduct would effectively disqualify the organisation from being a registered charity.

Guide Dogs Victoria’s social media accounts have been inundated with complaints, with many saying they will no longer donate to the charity.

In response to the backlash, Guide Dogs Victoria’s Chairman Iain Edwards has said the Board had “no prior knowledge of the distribution of this material and does not endorse it.”

“The board has … requested that this material be immediately removed from circulation. We will make no further comment during this process.”

It’s time to go Karen.

This is how it ends for Scott Morrison

April 4, 2022

ANY HOPES for a post budget poll boost for Scott Morrison have been well and truly dashed with the latest Newspoll showing the Coalition has increased its two-party preferred result by just 1 percentage point to 46 per cent, well within the margin of error.

The lackluster result comes as Scott Morrison faces yet another embarrassing showdown about his character – with claims he falsely accused his opponent of being a Muslim in the battle to win the 2007 preselection.

These latest revelations follow a conga line of complainants who accuse Morrison of being a bully, hypocrite and a liar.

The Prime Minister is hoping for some glimmer of hope that fortune may return in his favour and the federal budget was meant to offer this lifeline.

However, with polls stubbornly predicting a Labor landslide, and his personal brand so toxic that he refuses to meet and greet flood affected locals in Lismore, he will no doubt become more desperate as time rolls on towards the May election.

But this is how it well end for Morrison, just as his other occupations have ended in barely concealed failure and ignominy, his legacy as Prime Minister will be remembered for one thing and one thing only – a failed marketing man.

Update: The latest IPSOS poll just released has Labor back at 55 ALP against the LNP at 45 signifying the federal budget poll bounce was a net zero gain.

Weekend Gab Fest!

March 18, 2022

Good afternoon

Here is an open thread where you can talk about whatever you like..

Have a lovely weekend.


Send in the tanks: Russia invades Ukraine!

February 22, 2022

VLADIMIR PUTIN has deployed troops to two Russia-backed separatist territories in Ukraine, escalating a conflict that Western officials warn could explode into one of the biggest armed clashes in Europe since World War II.

During a blunt televised address yesterday, Putin declared that Ukraine, as a country, was “created by Russia.”

Russian state television then showed Mr. Putin signing decrees directing the Russian Defense Ministry to deploy troops in those regions to carry out so-called “peacekeeping functions,” which is a bit like calling demolition experts “home improvement specialists.”

The White House has issued a statement saying the US will impose sanctions against people “doing business” in the separatist regions, and that it would “soon announce additional measures related to today’s blatant violation of Russia’s international commitments.”

Meanwhile Putin called Ukraine’s elected pro-Western leaders “stooges” and cast them as the aggressors, even though Russia has an estimated 150,000 to 190,000 soldiers surrounding Ukraine.

While Putin’s ultimate plans remain a mystery, a full invasion would constitute the largest military action in Europe since World War II.


February 1, 2022

Scott Morrison has been left visibly shattered after leaked bombshell text messages between former NSW Premier Gladys Berejiklian and a current Liberal Minister were revealed by Network Ten journalist Peter van Onselen at Morrison’s appearance at the National Press Club earlier today.

‘I’ve got them right here,’ said Van Onselen.

In one she described you as, quote, “a horrible, horrible person“, going on to say she did not trust you, and that “you’re more concerned with politics than people.” 

‘The minister is even more scathing, describing you as a fraud and, quote,”a complete psycho“.

‘Does this exchange surprise you?’ asked Van Onselen. ‘And what do you think it tells us?’

The Prime Minister was left almost speechless by the surprise attack, pausing briefly, apparently stunned, before replying curtly and moving on to the next question.

‘Well, I don’t know who you’re referring to, or the basis of what you’ve put to me,’ he said. ‘But I obviously don’t agree with it. And I don’t think that’s my record.’

EXCLUSIVE: What’s wrong with this Picture – George Christensen’s Wedding Shock Disgrace!

January 20, 2022

A LOT OF PEOPLE have been ridiculing this photo of George Christensen’s wedding on social media, which seems a bit uncharitable if you ask me, with one individual who shall remain nameless (yes it was you @killmebilly ) suggesting it’s like one of those “how many things can you find wrong with this picture?” cartoons.

Now I certainly wouldn’t want to encourage that sort of thing (heaven forbid), but it did get me thinking – what can you see that others might overlook…??

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