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US citizens to pay for Mexico’s Wall under Trump’s Bizarre Tariff plan

January 27, 2017

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In Australia, you can (apparently) choose between a deposit for your first home or a smashed avocado sanga, but in the US, citizens are about to discover that the price of avocados can soar a lot higher.

President Trump has announced that the US will introduce a new 20% tariff on goods imported from Mexico to pay for the controversial “Wall” that will separate the US from its neighbour.

White House press secretary Sean Spicer told reporters on Air Force One Thursday that Trump was backing the proposal and had just discussed it with congressional Republicans in a private meeting.

Spicer dodged reporters’ questions about the impact of the border tax on American consumers, instead stressing the tax’s benefits for American workers.

“I’m not going to get into it,” he added when pressed about businesses that manufacture goods in Mexico passing along the tax to American consumers.

When it comes to fruits and vegetables, Mexico is the top foreign supplier to the US, so any such tariff is only going to increase the prices paid for these goods by US citizens.

In 2014, the U.S. bought $5.4 billion of vegetables and $4.7 billion of fruit from its southern neighbour.  Just last week, Mexico shipped 53 million pounds of avocados to the US alone.  That’s a lot of guacamole.

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The move follows a recent ‘not-so-subtle announcement’ from Mexican President Enrique Pena Nieto that his government has little inclination to subsidise the construction of the barrier along the border.

 

 

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SHOCK: PRESIDENT TRUMP IS A GENETICALLY ENGINEERED ALIEN CLONE!

January 20, 2017
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RUSSIAN TECHNICIANS ADD FINAL TOUCHES TO THE TRUMP CLONE

EXCLUSIVE

In a stunning shock revelation, The Gutter Trash can reveal that President Donald J Trump is in fact a Russian clone manufactured to infiltrate the U.S. administration and launch a Soviet plot to destabilize the West and create all-out war with China and North Korea.

THE EVIDENCE

The explosive claims have been verified by forensic scientists who examined the photographic evidence supplied confidentially by our exclusive sources.

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BORIS NOSTROVYA: PART MAN, PART MACHINE

According to our sources, President Trump is in fact Boris Nostrovya a former trainee agent with the KGB hired to play the role of Trump due to his striking resemblance to the flamboyant billionaire.

Our investigations have uncovered the extent of this sinister plot and it reaches all the way to the upper echelons of the Kremlin and implicates Vladimir Putin himself.

PART MAN, PART MACHINE

But where did the Russians obtain the technology to create such a perfectly formed clone? One theory is that the Russians have in fact made contact with extra-terrestrial life forms who are sharing their advanced technology with the Kremlin in a pact to unsettle the West and gain access to the world’s scarce resources.

We already know that the Kremlin has deployed alien weapons systems to support the country’s intervention in Syria.

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ALIENS ALREADY HERE SAYS RUSSIAN PM

These extraordinary claims have been verified by Russian Prime Minister Dmitry Medvedev’s startling admission on live television that aliens in human form already roam undetected in Russian society.

INSIDERS FEAR FOR THEIR LIVES

One insider close to the top-secret project told us that many people are too scared to speak out through fear of recrimination.

“Scientists and engineers are terrified to say anything. We have to do what they [the aliens] want, otherwise they’ll take our wives, our children. Many workers on the project have already disappeared,” he said.

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IS PUTIN AN ALIEN TOO?

With the Trump bot already issuing threats to China and North Korea, the Putin-alien alliance and their agenda for world domination is already set in motion.

The question remains, can we even stop them?

 

Related: Obama warns Putin: Aliens will take over the Earth by Sept 2017.

Multi-cultural billboard causes national outrage!

January 18, 2017

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A billboard depicting two smiling Muslim girls with the Australian flag has been removed after threats were made against the company behind it.

The digital sign featured rolling images of people from various cultural backgrounds, however the the picture of two Muslim girls celebrating Australia Day caused a national outrage.

One Facebook user commented: “This is f**kin shit. Take the s*** down and replace them with full blood real Aussie’s [sic] or anything Aussie related. U no people playing cricket at the beach, BBQ, thongs, beer. Anything but this… I thought Australia Day was meant to be about OUR culture like it used to b, not about Muslim people.”

Another Facebook user said the billboard indicates Australia “is now a Muslim country” and that it is directing all women to wear hijabs.

“Let’s put real Aussies on the posters wearing expected Aussie gear, not clothes dictated by men in a foreign land. Let’s get Australia back to being Australian!”

The billboard also copped the ire of Pauline Hanson who is calling for the burqa to be banned in Queensland.

It’s kind of ironic that One Nation’s ethos insists that Muslims who arrive here should “assimilate to our way of life,” but when they try to, we tell them to fuck off anyway.

 

 

Turnbull Govt hits 2017 in Success Mode!

January 9, 2017

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The Turnbull Government has entered 2017 much as it left 2016.

In tatters.

Only this time it has ramped up its tendency to create self-inflicted disaster with renewed vigour.

Many of us, myself included, are only just returning to work after a couple of weeks away from all the mayhem to find that not just a handful of people had been affected by the Centrelink extortion racket but in fact many thousands of elderly pensioners have been sent letters of demand requesting payments of ostensibly ‘misappropriated funds’ amounting to thousands of dollars.

One colleague I spoke to today said his mother had received one such letter, and when she called Centrelink to enquire, was threatened that if she didn’t pay it they would look through her history to find more monies owing.

As one former Turnbull adviser said, if Centrelink was a private company, it would be shut down for fraud.

On the back of Census debacle, this is one catastrophe the LNP Government cannot afford. Particularly when you consider retirees traditionally make up the Government’s support base.

The inimitable Sussan Ley, property investor extraordinaire and occasional Health Minister, has also declared that she will return some of the costs associated with her trip to the Gold Coast to make a spur-of-the-moment purchase in an investment property while apparently visiting a family to talk about their medicine.

Nevertheless, she insists that she’s done nothing wrong, and despite standing down while a so-called “independent” investigation into her other expenses takes place (conducted by the Govt no less, how’s that for independence), maintains that she’ll back in the job soon, doing what she does best. Investing in real estate.

A handful of cabcharge vouchers cost Peter Slipper his job. So it’s difficult to see how Ley can survive this little foray.

All this, and we’ve barely entered week two of the new year.

Meanwhile Malcolm Turnbull is nowhere to be seen.

 

 

 

All I want for Christmas is Youse!

December 19, 2016

13 Incredible Christmas Decoration Ideas

Hello everybody!

It’s that time of year again when we get together and pretend that we all like each other.

Some of you have already jumped the gun, with all this talk of collectables, smoked meats and barbecues.

Heck you’d even be forgiven for thinking that Walrus and TB actually ‘like’ each other parumpapumpum.

But, in the interests of it being crass mass n’all, the benevolent board at The Gutter Trash International Media Consortium have decided that it’s time to splash out on gifts for our many, many grateful contributors, and so they’ve given me the job of choosing them for all of youse.

No don’t thank me.

Falalalalalalala.

So here are my gifts. Enjoy…!

For Splatterbottom, and for the benefit of your friends and family…

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Dear ToSY

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For YoM

For the sophisticated individual who has everything, I give you the gift of your own attractive and professionally attired sommelier …

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For Neil…

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For Kittylitter.. I made you some nice muffins..

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For TB.. a new business opportunity to take advantage of your unique skills..

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For ToM R some musical entertainment..

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For Shane, some advice for dealing with arseholes..

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For Walrus.. some lovely reading material..

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For #TeaBagz (and for the benefit of the rest of us too)..

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For Meta:

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For Toilet boss:

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Happy regularly-occurring-time-of-the-year everyone!

Did I miss anyone…? 😯

 

Polygamy: “Political Correctness Gone Mad” says Pauline Hanson

December 12, 2016

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Pauline Hanson has taken aim at the Department of Human Services over allegations that Centrelink is paying spousal benefits to the second and third wives of Muslim men all living under the same roof.

A clearly rattled Ms Hanson said that mainstream political parties were “too gutless” to condemn the practice.

“If we keep ­appeasing these groups they will want more and more,” Ms Hanson said.

“They will keep going on and abusing us, our generosity and our culture.”

The One Nation leader took aim squarely at the major political parties, “We have been taken for fools”.

“Second marriages and all that are not ­acknowledged in this country or their children, and they should not be funded at all,” Ms Hanson said.

“It is against the law to have multiple marriages, but we are condoning it as taxpayers.”

Pentecostal christian and acting “Federal Treasurer” Scott Morrison also took aim saying that instances where polygamy was being used to claim multiple spousal benefits were “100 per cent wrong”.

But he did admit that said it would be more expensive for the government if each wife claimed an independent welfare allowance.

“The law and its implementation cannot condone polygamy. It’s against our values, it’s 100 per cent wrong,” he said.

Centrelink does not hold data based on polygamous relationships or religion, something Liberal Senator Cory Bernardi labelled “a convenient excuse”.

“We are always told the data is not kept,” he said as he joined Ms Hanson in her condemnation, saying the payments were “political correctness gone mad”.

“The lack of will to confront some individuals who seek to apply a different law to themselves means politicians are afraid to speak out,” he said.

But not anymore, apparently.

Unhinged Turnbull unleashes bizarre rant against “rich white kids from Europe”

December 1, 2016

Liberal Party Votes On Leadership As Tony Abbott Responds To Challenge From Malcolm Turnbull

Malcolm Turnbull has gone on a bizarre rant on ABC radio this morning claiming that “Bill Shorten thinks rich kids from Europe should pay less tax than Pacific Islanders working here to send money back to their villages.”

“They say a backpacker from Europe, a rich kid on holidays here from Germany or Norway, backpacking around, he or she should pay less tax and that Pacific Islander who comes here to pick fruit during the season and is sending that money back to his village – some of the poorest countries in the world,” he said.

“The Labor Party, for nothing other than political cynicism, wants these white kids – rich white kids from Europe – who come here on their holidays to pay less tax than some of the Pacific Islanders from some of the poorest countries in the world.”

“And [Mr Shorten] wants these kids, from Europe, to pay less tax than Australians working alongside them. I mean, seriously!

“What’s the principle there?”

Labor has attacked Mr Turnbull for claiming Australians would pay more tax than backpackers because locals can access the tax free threshold for the first $18,200 of their yearly income.

Shadow treasurer Chris Bowen said Mr Turnbull’s comments on foreign workers were “unhinged” and inaccurate.

Under the tax rules for backpackers, 95 per cent of their compulsory super contributions are claimed by the Government when they leave Australia.

DEBATE RAGES OVER TAX RATE

The combination of super tax and the tax rate means the effective tax rate for backpackers under Labor’s compromise of 10.5 per cent is higher than for the Seasonal Worker Program, as these workers are not subject to the same superannuation clawback arrangements.

In addition, under Labor’s 10.5 per cent compromise, there is no income level at which someone on a working holiday visa pays less tax than an Australian worker.

While the Prime Minister is usually an expert when it comes to rich people and the tax they pay, he’s been caught lying today.

Under the Liberals, the backpacker tax:

• Went from zero per cent to 32.5 per cent in the 2015 Budget;

• Then to 19 per cent after a Malcolm Turnbull’s backbench revolted;

• Then to 15 per cent after the crossbench rolled the Government; and

• Is now back at 32.5 per cent after the Turnbull Government lost a second vote in the Senate.

Peak lobby group the National Farmers Federation said it would be a disaster for fruit growers if the 32.5 per cent tax rate kicked in from January.

There is no one else to blame but Malcolm Turnbull and Barnaby Joyce for the backpacker tax debacle they find themselves in.

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