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Coalition back in the race with Morrison at the helm

October 15, 2018


Latest Newspoll shows Morrison in commanding humiliating loss

The decision to dump Malcolm Turnbull and install Scott Morrison as PM has paid dividends for the government with the latest Newspoll showing the Government trailing Labor 47 to 53 on the election-deciding two party preferred basis.

Prior to Turnbull’s demise, the Government was sitting at 49 to 51.

Mr Morrison and his LNP colleagues will be further buoyed by the Fairfax-Ipsos poll, also released last night, which shows the Government trailing Labor by a mere 10 points on the 2PP.

The Fairfax-Ipsos survey also found that that 74 per cent of voters oppose laws that  allow religious schools to dismiss students and teachers based on their sexual orientation, gender identity or relationship status.

Poll Gloom for Bill Shorten

The decision by the Liberals to dump Turnbull from the prime ministership 7 weeks ago and install the former treasurer resulted in an immediate dive in the polls – kind of like a “reverse honeymoon”.

The prime minister now faces a significant test on Saturday, where the Liberals will attempt to hold Malcolm Turnbull’s Sydney seat of Wentworth, however several polls suggest there will be a strong protest vote against the government.

“God talks to me at 4.30am”

Fortunately, the PM claims to have a direct line to the almighty, and is convinced that the Government will prevail this weekend and at the Federal Election next year.

Meanwhile in the real world, today’s Liberal party “comeback” as reflected in the polls would deliver the ALP an electoral victory equal to the largest win in the past 35 years.




Fact Check: Will you pay more tax under a Labor Govt?

October 8, 2018


The Prime Preacher Scott Morrison, has declared Bill Shorten’s plan to fund schools and hospitals as a plan for Australians to simply pay more tax.

Is he right…?

Or is it just bullshit…?

A quick historical check confirms that LNP led governments have been the highest taxing governments since 1973.


AFL Grand Final Preview!

September 24, 2018


From the mahogany desk of Tom of Melbourne comes this year’s AFL Grand Final Preview..!

The Eagles are the most loathsome team in the AFL – and not simply because of their history of drug taking or their association with gangsters.  That’s just how everyone behaves in Perth – really, there would never have been a mining boom without gangster types!

The Eagles are loathed because of their supporters. While those who barrack for Collingwood are toothless** bogans and equally biased, they can be excused, in part. It isn’t their fault that –

  • They’re illiterate dole bludgers
  • Their parents were also illiterate dole bludgers
  • Their parole officer was a Collingwood supporter and so was the arresting police office

Collingwood supporters didn’t have a choice, it’s generational, socio-economic and everyone in the housing commission block barracked for them.

On the other hand, Eagles supporters had a choice – the team is only about a generation old, the traditions of the club have as much depth as the Perth cultural and arts community.

And the fans are so unsporting! The crowd is full of middle class fanatics – sharing their insulting spittle with other outraged family groups whenever a free kick is paid to the opposition. There’s dad teaching his 8 year old son how to burst a blood vessel while screaming at the umpire because… well, who knows why, but everyone is doing it!

It is painful to recommend support for the Magpies – but good taste requires a Collingwood win.

**Please note – that’s an exaggeration, most Collingwood supporters have at least 4 teeth.


Why was Michelle Guthrie Sacked from the ABC?

September 24, 2018

Michelle Guthrie.png

Controversial Managing Director Michelle Guthrie has been sacked from the ABC effective immediately.

According to a statement released by the ABC, the decision was made when the directors resolved that it was “not in the best interests of the ABC” for Ms Guthrie to continue to lead the organisation.

Guthrie has been widely criticised as an LNP lackey who has orchestrated a “dumbing down” of the national broadcaster steering its focus away from political analysis and current affairs and more towards “lifestyle” programming.

No explanation has been offered for Guthrie’s sacking but given the broadcaster has kicked around as a political football for the last ten years or so it begs the question as to whether there has been political intervention in this latest turn of events.

Are they paving the way for a potential Labor Federal Government, or has there been some divine intervention in the interim?


Barnaby Joyce lashes out at “traitor” Malcolm Turnbull

August 28, 2018
Screen Shot 2018-08-28 at 1.07.23 pm

Talcum and Rooter in happier times

On today’s episode of I DON’T GIVE A FUCK, former Deputy PM and Nationals Leader Barnaby “rooter” Joyce has taken a swipe at Malcolm Turnbull for resigning from parliament, saying he owes it to the Coalition to stay because otherwise they might lose the next federal election.

Teetering on a one-seat majority, Turnbull’s resignation will force a by-election in the upmarket inner-Sydney Eastern suburbs electorate of Wentworth.

The newly appointed “special envoy for the drought” (whatever the hell that is), made the remark in a round of media appearances coinciding with his national tour to promote his new book “Weatherboard and Iron” which currently has a one star rating over at Angus and Robertson.

Joyce told Channel Seven’s Sunrise program that Turnbull had been elected to “the highest office in the land” which came with a “sense of honour,” suggesting that part of that honour should include continuing to serve constituents in Wentworth after being deposed.

Marriage vows tend to come with a sense of honour and commitment too, yet Barnaby had no qualms about ditching the commitment he made to his wife and kids before shacking up with his shag-muffin and former media adviser Vikki Campion.

The drought has dried up my field of fucks for Barnaby Joyce. But if I had a spare, I’d shove it down his fucking throat.



Turnbull’s Legacy will be sweet FA.

August 21, 2018

Jewellery Bishop arrives at Canberra disguised as Catwoman

It’s business as usual over at the LNP government and any talk of a leadership coup is pure speculation and practically non-existent.  

That’s the message senior pollies at the Liberal Party would like us to believe if Scott Morrison’s performance on ABC’s 7:30 show is anything to go by who rejected claims of an all-out assault on Malcolm Turnbull’s leadership saying that “no one has called me about it.”

Josh Frydenberg has also thrown his support behind the PM as has Peter Dutton insisting that he won’t [personally] challenge Turnbull for the top job.

All three are considered leadership aspirants who would relish the opportunity to occupy the highest office in the land.

The not-so-silent assassin in all of this, former PM Tony “there will be no wrecking, back-grounding or sniping” Abbott is on a personal vendetta to destroy Malcolm Turnbull and backed with his conservative cronies – the likes of Kevin Andrews and Eric Abetz – they’re hell-bent on his success.

Whether or not Abbott is reinstated as leader of the Liberal Party is a moot point. The cabal will be happy if Peter Dutton is installed as he’ll basically do whatever they tell him anyway, and if recent history is anything to go by, Dutton isn’t afraid to take things even further to the far right; particularly in terms of national security and immigration, of which he has pretty much unfettered control and has already demonstrated his rabid right-wing credentials.

He’s pretty much the poster-boy for the right-wing nutter brigade.

Having abandoned every principle he once held, incumbent Prime Minister Turnbull’s leadership is in its final death throes and when the assassination is unleashed, as it most undoubtedly will, he’ll go down in history as one of Australia’s most ineffectual Prime Ministers.

A PM who dumped his passion for action on climate change, slapped the LGBT community in the face with his divisive plebiscite, and left us all with a less than third world internet service as his lasting legacy.

Thanks for nothing Talcum.




July 3, 2018


There’s a scene in the movie Children of Men where the character played by Michael Caine (Jasper Palmer) walks outside of the family home to be knowingly shot dead by government officials who suspect he’s colluding with other anarchists who fail to subscribe to the prevailing government’s ethos.

The movie points to a dystopian future where the media and the government are complicit in forming popular opinion and actively encourage citizens to commit suicide as a way to lessen the burden on the rest of society.

While we may not have arrived at this stage yet, I fear our current government has set us upon a path that could see such a scenario unfold in the distant future. Let’s face it, voting citizens are just an unnecessary inconvenience to an otherwise omnipotent government.

While this prediction may seem melodramatic, consider for a moment, the state of things in Australia.

Our current media landscape is dominated by three main players; Fairfax, News Ltd, and the government funded/subsidised ABC and SBS.

As most of us already know, News Ltd content, and its coverage is pretty much exclusively pro-conservative in its leanings and this extends to the current government.

Fairfax has, for the last ten to 15 years or so, presented a fairly ‘balanced’ view when it comes to political coverage, however this has become compromised in recent years in no part due to its declining audience, and therefore an increasing pressure to present coverage that is favourable to its ever reducing base of corporate advertisers .

If you’ve ever wondered why Fairfax continues to spruik residential property as a “sure fire” investment you need only consider that the weekend real estate supplement in both The Age and Sydney Morning Herald respectively, are responsible for the overwhelming majority of its revenue. This, despite recurring figures that show we’re heading towards a monumental property crash.

The ABC, already on life support after savage budget cuts, is under increasing pressure to provide pro-government coverage (irrespective of whoever is in power), for its very survival, a move that serves as both a disservice to Australians (who fund it) and pushes it further towards becoming a government propaganda channel, rather than a mechanism for holding the government of the day to account as per its charter.

Scott Morrison and Mathias Cormann would have us all believe that the economy is doing fine and the future is rosy, but you’d have to be a moron to believe this is true.

Interest rates are at record lows, not because the economy is doing well, but because it’s on life support, and with no prospect of recovering any time soon.

Trump is rapidly heading the world towards an international trade war that will see share markets tumble and plunge the world into economic crisis.

Meanwhile in Australia, we have among the highest (if not the highest) level of household debt in the developed world, high levels of underemployment, escalating job insecurity, and wage stagnation.

The Turnbull govt is busy slashing penalty rates and subsidising big business – with OUR money – while telling us ‘we’ve never had it so good.’

This whole sorry saga is about to some crashing down on our heads and it will be all thanks to the neo-cons at the LNP.

My advice – get out of debt now, while you still can.


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