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Election Night Bingo!

May 6, 2022


Just when you thought it was safe to return to the Bingo halls of Brighton or the Rooty Hill RSL, The Gutter Trash presents our infamous Election Night Bingo Drinking Game.

Here’s how it works…

Simply print out the Election Night bingo card above and then mark off the catch phrases as they are uttered by the irrepressible Antony Green at the ABC tally room, or one of suckhole guests on the panel.

A “responsible drinking guide” is suggested at the top of the table for those who want to make an occasion out of it.


ALP surges ahead of LNP as interest rates dominate campaign

May 3, 2022

The ALP has increased its lead over the over the Morrison LNP Government as higher than expected ABS inflation increases upward pressure on interest rates.

The ALP gained 1% point on a two-party preferred basis during the week to Sunday May 1, increasing its lead to 11% points according to the latest Roy Morgan Poll conducted from April 25 to May 1, 2022.

The weekly Roy Morgan Government Confidence Rating plunged 8pts to 84 this week after the ABS reported higher than expected inflation of 5.1% for the year to March 2022 – the highest figure for over 20 years. The higher than expected inflation has increased the pressure on the RBA to raise interest rates for the first time in more than a decade – perhaps as soon as today.

There are now far more Australians, 50% (up 3.5% points), who say the country is ‘heading in the wrong direction’ compared to just over a third of Australians, 34% (down 4.5% points), who say the country is ‘heading in the right direction’.

This week’s result is the first swing to the ALP so far during the campaign and if a Federal Election had been held last weekend the ALP would have won a clear majority.

The law is clear: Guide Dogs Australia must lose its charitable status.

April 20, 2022

GUIDE DOGS VICTORIA IS IN FULL DAMAGE CONTROL MODE after its CEO Karen Hayes appeared in flyers emblazoned with Liberal Party colours backing Josh Frydenberg in his push to be re-elected as the Member for Kooyong.

Under the heading “Why I’m supporting Josh Frydenberg,” Hayes, pictured clutching a puppy is quoted as saying “Time and time again, Josh has shown his genuine care for Guide Dogs Victoria and the people with low vision and blindness we serve.”

However, the move appears to directly contravene Federal Government guidelines that stipulate that a charity must not “promote (or oppose) a political party or candidate for political office.”

The law is clear. Such conduct would effectively disqualify the organisation from being a registered charity.

Guide Dogs Victoria’s social media accounts have been inundated with complaints, with many saying they will no longer donate to the charity.

In response to the backlash, Guide Dogs Victoria’s Chairman Iain Edwards has said the Board had “no prior knowledge of the distribution of this material and does not endorse it.”

“The board has … requested that this material be immediately removed from circulation. We will make no further comment during this process.”

It’s time to go Karen.

This is how it ends for Scott Morrison

April 4, 2022

ANY HOPES for a post budget poll boost for Scott Morrison have been well and truly dashed with the latest Newspoll showing the Coalition has increased its two-party preferred result by just 1 percentage point to 46 per cent, well within the margin of error.

The lackluster result comes as Scott Morrison faces yet another embarrassing showdown about his character – with claims he falsely accused his opponent of being a Muslim in the battle to win the 2007 preselection.

These latest revelations follow a conga line of complainants who accuse Morrison of being a bully, hypocrite and a liar.

The Prime Minister is hoping for some glimmer of hope that fortune may return in his favour and the federal budget was meant to offer this lifeline.

However, with polls stubbornly predicting a Labor landslide, and his personal brand so toxic that he refuses to meet and greet flood affected locals in Lismore, he will no doubt become more desperate as time rolls on towards the May election.

But this is how it well end for Morrison, just as his other occupations have ended in barely concealed failure and ignominy, his legacy as Prime Minister will be remembered for one thing and one thing only – a failed marketing man.

Update: The latest IPSOS poll just released has Labor back at 55 ALP against the LNP at 45 signifying the federal budget poll bounce was a net zero gain.

Weekend Gab Fest!

March 18, 2022

Good afternoon

Here is an open thread where you can talk about whatever you like..

Have a lovely weekend.


Send in the tanks: Russia invades Ukraine!

February 22, 2022

VLADIMIR PUTIN has deployed troops to two Russia-backed separatist territories in Ukraine, escalating a conflict that Western officials warn could explode into one of the biggest armed clashes in Europe since World War II.

During a blunt televised address yesterday, Putin declared that Ukraine, as a country, was “created by Russia.”

Russian state television then showed Mr. Putin signing decrees directing the Russian Defense Ministry to deploy troops in those regions to carry out so-called “peacekeeping functions,” which is a bit like calling demolition experts “home improvement specialists.”

The White House has issued a statement saying the US will impose sanctions against people “doing business” in the separatist regions, and that it would “soon announce additional measures related to today’s blatant violation of Russia’s international commitments.”

Meanwhile Putin called Ukraine’s elected pro-Western leaders “stooges” and cast them as the aggressors, even though Russia has an estimated 150,000 to 190,000 soldiers surrounding Ukraine.

While Putin’s ultimate plans remain a mystery, a full invasion would constitute the largest military action in Europe since World War II.


February 1, 2022

Scott Morrison has been left visibly shattered after leaked bombshell text messages between former NSW Premier Gladys Berejiklian and a current Liberal Minister were revealed by Network Ten journalist Peter van Onselen at Morrison’s appearance at the National Press Club earlier today.

‘I’ve got them right here,’ said Van Onselen.

In one she described you as, quote, “a horrible, horrible person“, going on to say she did not trust you, and that “you’re more concerned with politics than people.” 

‘The minister is even more scathing, describing you as a fraud and, quote,”a complete psycho“.

‘Does this exchange surprise you?’ asked Van Onselen. ‘And what do you think it tells us?’

The Prime Minister was left almost speechless by the surprise attack, pausing briefly, apparently stunned, before replying curtly and moving on to the next question.

‘Well, I don’t know who you’re referring to, or the basis of what you’ve put to me,’ he said. ‘But I obviously don’t agree with it. And I don’t think that’s my record.’

EXCLUSIVE: What’s wrong with this Picture – George Christensen’s Wedding Shock Disgrace!

January 20, 2022

A LOT OF PEOPLE have been ridiculing this photo of George Christensen’s wedding on social media, which seems a bit uncharitable if you ask me, with one individual who shall remain nameless (yes it was you @killmebilly ) suggesting it’s like one of those “how many things can you find wrong with this picture?” cartoons.

Now I certainly wouldn’t want to encourage that sort of thing (heaven forbid), but it did get me thinking – what can you see that others might overlook…??

Christian Porter claims Victory after Court orders him to pay $430,000 in legal fees.

January 20, 2022
This is what winning looks like

FORMER ATTORNEY GENERAL and one time PM aspirant Christian Porter has chalked up yet another successful court room victory with the Federal Court decreeing that the alleged rapist and his defamation lawyer must pay more than $430,000 to cover the legal costs of a friend of the woman who accused him of rape in the 1980s.

In what can only be seen as yet another embarrassing backdown for the ABC, this new ruling brings Mr Porter’s legal costs to over one million dollars.

Earlier this year, Christian Porter sued the ABC for defamation over the allegations.

The ABC agreed to settle the case out of court following a request from Mr Porter’s lawyers and handed over a token $100K towards his legal costs however the ABC stands by its original report outlining the damaging rape allegations and has not issued an apology.

These new costs are on top of his estimated $500,000 plus in legal fees for the now discontinued defamation case.

Speaking to The Gutter Trash, Mr Porter said:

“This yet another humiliating backdown for the ABC and my accusers in a long conga line of embarrassing blunders.”

“You wait and see, ultimately I will be completely vindicated and I won’t be satisfied until my legal costs are well over $10 million. Then we’ll see who has the last laugh….!”

Emulating former US President Donald Trump, Mr Porter added:

“You’re gonna see so much winning you’re gonna be sick of all the winning…!!”

The ABC was unavailable for comment.

Scott Morrison: “I’m suffering too.”

January 14, 2022

Look I’m not saying that Scott Morrison is out of touch with the plight of ordinary Australians who are struggling to buy a pack of sausages to feed the family or heaven forbid a Rapid Antigen test of which Simon Birmingham (who coincidentally is trying to butch up his mousey appearance by growing some facial hair) says there’s a plentiful supply even though no one on dog’s green earth can seem to find one,

NO! That would be far too indulgent.

Instead, our self-sacrificing Prime Minister (in title only by all accounts) insists that he too is suffering from the ill-effects of Covid by having to lend himself to the arduous tasks and responsibilities associated with the high office he holds.

Yesterday, fronting the media to burble a fresh bout of bullshit our beleaguered leader became clearly testy with reporters venting that he was unable to spend his “anniversary” with “Jen” because “he had to work,” (even though it wasn’t actually their wedding anniversary).

After a rambling press conference that failed to address the unfolding Novak Djokovic visa debacle that’s currently exposing the Federal Government as a shambolic shit show of incompetence on the International stage, the PM turned as he was walking away from the podium to say:

‘One last thing, indulge me this. Happy anniversary Jenny, I hope I get to see you soon’.

Scott and Jen sign their marriage certificate

Aw, poor Scott and Jen couldn’t together because he’s suffering too.

What a crock of shit.

It’s yet another cynical carefully-orchestrated move designed to solicit sympathy from a psychopath who has no qualms about locking kids indefinitely in detention, sending people back to work without adequate protection from Covid and insisting that people can go out and buy RA tests when none are actually available!

Heck we can’t even buy food anymore!

He can go fuck himself.

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